Lately I've got a whole lot of dreams. While my dreams do have monsters, crazy ideas, and something a little beyond reality about them, nothing really interesting has been happening while I've been sleeping. Nope, these are my waking dreams.
I have dreams of building a completely new education paradigm for the inner city. I have dreams of every child being loved and cherished for the gift from God they are and each one having a forever family of their very own. I have dreams of one day having a little world just in my own house with adopted or fostered kids from all around the globe. I have dreams of being molded and used by God for something..I'm not positive what yet...but something! I have these crazy dreams in crazy detail that would be totally boring to just type out...but they're swimming around in my head all the time. They have some company too with the monsters. Monsters of the fear of failure, of never even getting to try, of missing something along the way, of settling in lots of areas of life, of nostalgia. Monsters that I unfortunately can't wake from. So, I just keep going and praying that in my dreams God would conquer the monsters and allow me to see what's so much better that he has for me beyond the small world I can see right now. Sometimes that's not fun. Actually a lot of times its not, but I have slowly seen the incredible fruit coming from it!
Patience and Trust are two things God has really been pushing these past couple of years, and when I wait on Him, he always comes through in bigger ways than I could ever dream up in my head. But when I just go with the easy thing that seems like the best option in my stupid head at the time, disaster never fails to be far behind. Seeing this hold true in soo many ways has hammered that lesson home and I definitely hope He's made His point. :) So right now, I am waiting and trusting, waiting and trusting, waiting and trusting, that God has placed these dreams heavy on my heart for a reason and that He has an incredible plan beyond what I can see or dream. I may not be able to do it on my own, but thankfully I wasn't created to!
Isaiah 42:16 Guide me Oh Lord.
I think this blog has kinda become my dream journal and the experiences that come with seeking those out. I pray God never stops burdening my heart for what is on His.